Thursday, November 8, 2012


As I'm sure you all know by now, Mathew and I are going to be welcoming our first little one on May 1 and we could not be more excited! I figured I would just share a few thoughts and experiences that I have had thus far.

You may remember a post a few months ago where I was commenting on how tired I was and how I needed to stop doing my intense workout. I thought all of those feelings were due to my thyroid and made an appointment with a special doctor to see if I could get things figured out. Three days before my appointment, I found out the real reason for my symptoms...there was a little baby taking away all of my energy!

The next couple of months were filled with so much fear and worry about miscarrying. I thought for sure I was going to have a miscarriage due to my family's history. I didn't want anyone to know I was pregnant. We told immediate family and made it very clear to keep it quiet! While I waited for my first appointment to finally arrive, I tried my hardest to keep my stress levels down and have faith that whatever was supposed to happen would. I could hardly contain my excitement when the day finally arrived and my doctor brought up the ultrasound image of our little baby. Its face definitely looked like a monkey but I'm hoping it has grown out of that by now. Also, I found it very adorable that it kept putting its hand up on its forehead, which is how I sleep every night.

As excited as we were to finally see our baby, I still had a major fear of miscarrying. I kept reading horror stories about women seeing the baby then two weeks later, having the miscarriage. I had another appointment this week and it was the most comforting appointment of all. The doctor put his little heartbeat hearer thing on my belly and there was the strong heartbeat of our baby. His words to me were: "no miscarriages for you!" I felt so relieved. I know there are still other risks but at least I can put one behind me.

Luckily, I haven't had too many terrible symptoms. My biggest one was exhaustion! I had to start going to bed at 9 because I could barely function throughout the day. I only had about two or three weeks where I was kind of nauseous. I lucked out on that one for sure! The worst bit of nausea came when we got a Little Ceasar's pizza. Very bad decision. I was having some major headaches. They still come and go but man pregnancy headaches are the WORST! Especially when my job is working on a computer all day. I did start getting tons of sugar cravings! All I wanted to eat was candy and donuts. Unfortunately there was a giant jar of delicious taffy at work and I couldn't keep my hands out of it for a while.

On that note, I have been a little disappointed in myself when it comes to eating. Once I found out I was pregnant, I seriously lost all self-control. For once in my life I wanted to be able to eat what I wanted, when I wanted. I loved not worrying about my body. I completely regret making that decision. I was horrified when I went to my first appointment and saw the number on the scale. I was still horrified but less so when I saw it jump again at my second appointment. I can only imagine what will happen at my next appointment after Thanksgiving! The last couple of days, I have tried really hard to get myself back under control and treat this baby right. It deserves good nutrition and I haven't been providing that. Mathew and I made a commitment with my sister to only eat out ONE time in the month of November. Utah has too many amazing restaurants that are far too tempting. We have some major consequences if we fail. Rewards just weren't working with the other goals we had tried to make previously. I feel confident that this restriction will help me gain more control of my eating.

Another thing we have discovered is that picking out names is HARD! I had a few that I kind of liked, but I can't help but associate each name with someone and whether I like the person or not...the name has a different meaning to me. However, we finally found the perfect girl name! We are still working on a name for a boy. A few weeks ago it was just the opposite. I was set on a boy name and could not come up with any girl names I liked.

Finally, I would just like to say that maternity pants rock. Yes I am already wearing them at 15 weeks. Don't judge. :)

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Why I'll Never Complain Again...Hypothetically

Wal-Mart is an interesting place. I go there knowing I'm going to be annoyed at something, whether it's the associates, or lack there-of, the long lines, the somewhat empty shelves, the weird-o customers, the inability to find something, etc. But, I also go there knowing I will probably end up with what I need and get a good price.

Yesterday I had one of the most annoying experiences I have ever had at a retail store. Here's my story from the beginning:

I have been having this obnoxious sore throat for over a week now. It comes at night and lasts until breakfast. It keeps me up at night. It's awful. After a week of begging Mathew, I finally talked him into letting us by a humidifier. I figured some moisture might help? Well, we go to Wal-Mart Saturday night to get one, and of course the cheapest one was sold out, so we upgraded to the next cheapest. It sucked. Big time. Thankfully, Wal-Mart has the best return policy so we just took it back for a replacement last night.

Prior to going, I looked online to see what my options were going to be so I could be more educated this time and hopefully end up with a better one. Surprisingly, the cheaper one had good reviews and it said it was back in stock in the store! I was stoked. So off we go. After returning our crappy one, we went to grab the other one. The shelf is empty. We trek back to the customer service desk to see if they could check their inventory since we had seen they were in stock online. Stores have back stock...right? Well apparently, the girl was not interested in trying to help us. She had us go back to get the number of the item, which we did. There were like 5 numbers on the little sign, so we copied a couple. When we brought back the numbers, she mumbled some excuse about needing a manager so we left to find someone else.

Enter second associate. This girl seemed promising. Super nice, had a scanner, seemed energetic. Perfect. She followed us to the humidifiers and scanned the bar code. Inventory says there are 60. Yes! We were going to get our humidifier! Nope. She figured it must have been an inventory error or something and did nothing more. I was shocked. Seriously? Her little machine said there were some there, we saw online that if we ordered it, it would be available for pickup TODAY, and she still didn't go to the back or try to find someone else to help. Her advice was to go home and order one and wait for a week till it would be ready for pickup.

We did go home and we did order one right away. Less than an hour later we get a text saying our order is ready for pickup. I guess the inventory was right! Who would have guessed? So we go back and pick it up, but not before I had written a very lengthy complaint on

I thought maybe I would get an email with some auto-generated apology and maybe a coupon. Somehow my dad always gets coupons for complaining. Nope. This morning, I get a personal phone call from the manager at the store! I was mortified!!!!! He had me describe the situation and kept apologizing for what had happened. I kept apologizing for my outburst because I felt a bit overly dramatic. He also had me describe the girls that helped me so he could make sure it didn't happen again. It was definitely one of the most embarrassing phone calls I have ever had.

I am officially terrified to make a complaint to a store ever again. Now I'm worried those girls will lose their jobs, which is so not what I want. I just wanted my dang humidifier! So let this be a warning, if you complain to Wal-Mart, you will most likely get a response, so be prepared!

Thursday, October 4, 2012

My Favorite (Easy) Dinner Recipe

I would like to share with you one of my absolute favorite recipes. It came from my mom and it has become a staple at our place. It is SO easy and so delicious. You have probably seen similar recipes out there but I promise this one is awesome. Also, it produces great leftovers, which makes mornings even better when we are trying to put together lunches for work.

I'm going to give you the exact measurements for the ingredients, but usually I just guesstimate because most of them don't really matter. Also, sometimes I'll throw in some other left over veggies with the broccoli, like peas or carrots just to get rid of other leftovers in the fridge. Also, leftover chicken and rice make this recipe even easier.

*This has been waiting to be posted for a couple weeks...I was hoping to get a picture of it but the one I took looks bad, so just trust me, it's good!*

Cheesy Broccoli Rice Casserole


12-16 oz broccoli (frozen or fresh)
4 oz can of mushrooms (I hate mushrooms so I always leave this out, but it's there for you crazies who like them!)
1/2 cup chopped onion (If I don't have an onion, I just sprinkle some minced onion or onion powder)
1 can cream of chicken soup
2 Tbsp milk
3 oz Velveeta (feel free to cut off a little too much...I usually do)
2 cups cooked rice
1 cup diced chicken (1-2 chicken breasts)
Breadcrumbs or a box of stuffing mix


*Preheat oven to 350 if you use stuffing

1. Start by cooking your chicken if you aren't using leftovers. I just throw a frozen chicken breast in some boiling water and let it go while I do everything else.

2. Then get the rice going. I always forget to start my rice early and then I have to stand around the rice cooker waiting for it to pop. Someday I will remember to buy Minute Rice.

3. Steam the broccoli. I'm lazy and throw the broccoli in a bowl with a little bit of water, cover it with a plate and cook it in the microwave for 5-7 minutes until it's soft.


4. Make the sauce. Sautee the onions and mushrooms over medium heat with cooking spray. Add soup, cheese, and milk. Stir until the cheese melts. Once the chicken is cooked, shred/chop it up and toss it in with the sauce.

5. *Optional Step* Make your stuffing. Cook according to the directions on the box. I just leave out the butter/margarine to save a few calories and fat.

6. Layer! In an 8x11 pan, put the broccoli and other veggies down first, then cover that with rice, then pour the sauce over all of that and spread it around. If you chose to make stuffing, which I highly recommend, put that on top of everything else. Bake it at 350 for 30 minutes. If you chose breadcrumbs, just sprinkle some on top and serve! No baking necessary with the breadcrumbs, as long as everything was made fresh.

Enjoy! I probably make this at least once a month. Give it a try!

Tuesday, August 14, 2012


Thank you to everyone who was so thoughtful and helpful in regards to my stress. I received lots of great advice here and outside of the blogosphere. I've tried really hard to allow myself time to take deep breaths. It has really helped me to be working now. I love love love my job and I get so excited to go to work every day. It has helped tremendously to be more busy.

My mom gave me a good piece of advice after I had a long talk with her about some things I was struggling with. She told me that any time I feel overwhelmed or guilty for something from my past, to consciously replace that thought with something positive and encouraging. It seems really simple, but it's been good for me. It has been good to force myself to look for a positive. Anyways, I just wanted to say thank you for the comments.

Moving on to another touchy subject. Weight. It's been discussed before on here. It's always been a huge part of my life, ever since I was the fat girl in elementary school. I bought TurboFire and I absolutely LOVE it. I've been eyeing it for months. It's probably the best and most fun workout I have ever done. I feel challenged and I basically am drenched with sweat by the time I'm finished. Pretty sure I will not be doing it anymore though and I am so sad about it.

I have thyroid problems as you might remember. After doing some reading and listening to my sister, it occurred to me that I probably shouldn't be doing such a high intensity workout. It just puts way too much stress on my body which I guess can actually make me gain weight instead of lose it. I want so badly to push myself and power through the workouts because I feel so strong. Afterwards though, I really feel the negative effects of what I've done to my body. I feel drained instead of energized from the endorphins. I just feel insanely exhausted all day and I wake up after 8+ hours of sleep feeling like I just woke up from a 30 minute nap. It's been so strange.

I really just feel like I need to take it easy on myself. It's so hard for me to stop the workout program because I feel like a quitter..but something just doesn't feel right. My body doesn't feel normal; it doesn't feel like it did back when I did P90X.

I decided that I'm going to try really hard to accept myself how I am. I don't need to be 10 pounds lighter to be a good person. I don't need to be as thin as the girls I work with to feel good. What I need to do is again focus on the positives. I need to be able to love myself at any weight. My body may not want me to be thinner and I can't help but think about the things I'm missing in life if all I can focus on is losing weight. I have let it consume my life and it needs to stop.

I definitely am not planning on letting myself go and allowing my health to deteriorate. All I'm trying to say is that I want to be a stronger person in ways that have nothing to do with my body. I still plan to try to eat healthy and go on walks, but I feel strongly that I shouldn't be working my body to the ground right now.

I have tried to have different thoughts when I look in the mirror. If I see something I don't like, I try to accept it the way it is and then find something that I DO like. This journey is going to take me a LONG time and I fully expect to have moments of defeat. But I will not give up. I'm going to find a way to accept my body whether I lose ten pounds or gain ten pounds. It shouldn't matter.

Friday, August 3, 2012

Stress and Relaxation

I need some advice. How on earth do you clear your mind and relax?

I am definitely a Type A personality. I get worked up over the smallest things, I am insanely hard on myself, I get easily saddened/tired, I am super paranoid about everything, and it's impossible for me to just sit, do nothing, and relax. I know those don't all describe Type A, but oh well.

In my Turbo Fire stretch video, she talks to the Type A's and asks us if we can allow ourselves to let go and relax. I try, but I seriously can't. The second I try to clear my mind, something else jumps in and I start worrying about it or I think about everything I want to do that day. I don't understand why it's so hard for me to just chill out.

I'm so used to being in school and being extremely busy, which helps distract me from lame worries (Seriously, if you heard the things I worry about, you would think I am ridiculous). Right now, I just stay at home in a basement apartment all day, sewing, and watching Boy Meets World. I'm really lonely and bored. Thankfully, I start work on Monday and I couldn't be happier to have something to keep me busy and keep me around people. However, that doesn't help me solve the real problem of being able to relax. It kills me to just sit on the couch and do nothing. I feel so lazy and unproductive and plus just sitting makes clearing my mind even more difficult.

I'm sure this probably sounds very pity-me, like I know some of my other posts have sounded, but I genuinely need some advice. How can I clear my mind and allow myself to relax? I need so badly to calm myself down.

Saturday, July 21, 2012

Crafty Stuff

Remember how I mentioned I was starting a little sewing/craft blog? Well, it's up and running...with one baby post. Now that graduation is over, I hope to find time to REALLY get things going. But here is just a little intro: Ruffles and Polka Dots

Tuesday, June 26, 2012


This past week has been quite the roller coaster. I don't think I felt so worked up and jittery in a while. As many of you know, Mathew has been trying to find an internship for the fall. His catalog expires next July so if he doesn't finish all of his classes, he will have a whole new load of classes to take before he can graduate. So, this fall was his last chance to do an internship in order to avoid catalog expiration. You can probably imagine the stress and anxiety I have been feeling. My schooling has just really taken a back burner. I just don't really care if I'm the top performer or getting straight A's for the first time in my college career. I know I will be graduating and that is all that matters on my side. All I have cared about this semester is helping him find an internship. He is so busy with school and works so hard that I couldn't just make him do it by himself.

*I do not want this to sound like an "I'm an amazing wife" post...I just am trying to convey the stress that I have been experiencing lately*

Well anyways, many many many prayers have been said, just hoping we would get blessed with an amazing opportunity....or just any opportunity. I was on campus a few weeks ago thinking about this internship thing (of course) and I had this surprising thought to text Angela. I wasn't sure why, I didn't know if she actually knew any engineers but I decided to listen to that little prompting. I sent her a text and within an hour maybe she had already called me with an incredibly perfect (like perfect as in Mathew's ideal area of mechanical engineering) opportunity. I was floored. I seriously could not believe it. The second Mathew got home, we searched the website and found out everything we could about the company and then he majorly got out of his comfort zone and gave the place a call. They asked for his resume so he emailed it and before the end of the night, he had an interview the next day. Again floored. His classes were cancelled that day (surprise? I think not) and so we made the spontaneous trip to Layton in the morning.

He was so dedicated and determined to do well in this interview. Interviews make him really nervous, they are basically nonexistent for working farm jobs haha. So he woke up early and went to a practice interview on campus. It finished just in time for us to get on the road. I literally drilled him with interview questions the entire way down (I guess Junior Miss came in handy), and he was so ready by the time we pulled up to the place. I, being the nervous wreck that I am, was crocheting my life away in the car while I waited. I was just trying to keep my mind as busy as possible while trying to hold as still as possible in the blasted hot car. He was in there for forever, so I figured it was a good sign. Anyways, so the interview went well, except he didn't get asked ANY of the questions we drilled, even the ones that I have been asked in every job interview without fail.

Fast forward a week. He submitted the application but hadn't heard anything yet. I was going crazy! She was so insanely prompt at first that the second it slowed down a bit, I was so nervous. So we began the process of checking out other options. Nothing was moving forward and I turned into miss crazy again. Then miraculously one afternoon while I'm sitting in textiles and monitoring Mathew's email (I know I am seriously insane) he got the answer to our prayers. The reason we hadn't heard anything was because the background check was being processed, and as soon as it was finished, he'd receive an offer letter and start date! I was about to cry in the middle of my class I was so happy. So yeah, after this massive long story, Mathew has a paid internship!

Then the apartment hunt began. This is something that stressed me to my max when we moved to Blackfoot last fall. I just knew we weren't going to be able to find a short-term lease in our price range. Miracle of miracles, I got on Craigslist last night and a girl had just posted that they wanted to sell their lease that ended in January...exactly when we would need to move back to Rexburg, and RIGHT by where Mathew would be working and across the street from the mall where I was hoping to work at JCP. I of course immediately called and it just seemed too good to be true. It could not be this easy. We worked everything out today and we are going to Layton again this weekend to sign papers!

I just feel like so many prayers have been answered and worries have been diminished these last couple of days. We were getting so discouraged after so many companies were saying no or not responding. I was feeling helpless. Even though I pretended there was, there really wasn't anything I could do. I couldn't call the companies for him. I couldn't interview for him. I definitely couldn't do his homework for him. But those were all things I was dying to do to help.

*Also, I definitely do not want this to sound braggy or self-righteous. That is not at all my intention. We just feel incredibly blessed at the moment and I have needed to get these feelings of stress and excitement out for a while.*

We are so excited to move to a new place for a while. He is excited (even if he doesn't show it) to work at such a cool place. Oh by the way, the internship is at a place called KIHOMAC and they redesign and rebuild airplanes for the Air Force. Now that this stress is gone, I'm sure I will find something else to worry about. Maybe someday I'll start worrying about school and my graduation speech...but not today. Today has been a celebration day.

Sunday, June 24, 2012

NEW blog! Almost

I just wanted to let everyone know that I am working on a blog that I will actually post in regularly. I just don't post here like ever because nothing exciting happens very often. We are in school...I work...Mathew donates plasma...and I sew/crochet. Which is the inspiration for my new blog. It's going to be a sewing tutorial, crochet tutorial, all around crafty blog. I have been working on some fun projects and would love to share them but I don't get motivated to share on this blog because it's not really a craft theme. This new blog will be dedicated to all things crafty and anything else I want to post so get excited, because it should be fun! But realistically it may not be going until after graduation. That's right GRADUATION!!! So excited to be finished :)

Friday, April 27, 2012


For the past year, my hair has been coming out in chunks. Every time I take a shower, I pull out handful after handful of hair. When I brush my hair, tons comes out. Even if my brush starts out completely empty of hair, by the time I brush through it a couple times, it's full again. No matter how hard I try, I can't keep our bathroom floor from being covered in hair (sorry I know that's gross).  It's always driven me crazy and made me worry, but I never really thought to do anything about it. I knew it was normal to lose hair daily, but I have been losing waaaay more than normal and my hair is about half as thick as it used to be. Last week, I finally decided to go to the doctor and get my blood tested. 

Well, the results came back a couple days ago and looks like I do have hyperthyroidism. Both my mom and sister have thyroid problems, so I figured I would eventually have the same problem...I just didn't expect it this soon. I'm so glad I got it tested though. It explains so much, like why I gain weight quickly, why it's so hard to get it off, even when we are eating really healthy and walking three miles a day to and from class instead of driving. Also explains why I'm so dang cold all the time and why I am always tired. Even if I get plenty of sleep, I always feel sluggish and unmotivated to do anything. They put me on medication and I really hope it helps me feel better and more energized. It kind of made me realize how careful I need to be too. I really can't let myself get out of control with my eating. I'm really grateful, though, that I was able to discover this early on. So yeah, I am officially on thyroid medication! Here's to hoping for less hair loss and more energy!

Friday, February 17, 2012

Rexburg's Evil Powers

I think Rexburg is cursed for Mathew and I. When we come here, it kind of means eat out like crazy. We have gone out of control once again, and once again, I have gained weight! Ugh. I am trying so hard to not get depressed right now. I become so in denial sometimes. I think to myself, oh it's just this one time, or oh it's a special date night, I can eat what I want. The excuse list goes on and on...and on...and on.

I've been feeling extra yucky lately. We had a rough couple weeks where G's Dairy kept calling our names and our starving student card was just begging to be used. That starving student card is almost more of a curse. I feel like we have to get our money's worth so I am always saying, let's go eat here and get one meal free! Then of course we order more than normal because something's free and I eat until I can barely move. It's disgusting. But sadly, I think I'm realizing that I have a food addiction and I think I'm invincible to bad food.

I have kept saying things need to change, no more eating out, no more frequent desserts, no more eating late at night. I say all of this and commit, but then I just CAN'T keep my commitments! I don't understand what happens to me when I come to Rexburg. It's SO frustrating! I make so many excuses not to go to the gym, or not to make dinner and then I figure since I already messed up in one day, it's not going to do any good to be better the rest of the day.

I met with a fitness consultant at school and he gave me a workout regimen to do for a couple weeks then meet up with him again. For the first week, I did absolutely nothing. I had a million excuses to not workout. However, Wednesday, I did it. I went to the gym and was so proud. Then aaalll day yesterday I promised myself I would go to zumba last night. (I have said I'd go to zumba many times previously but always failed to go). I had to repeatedly tell myself that I would go and finally I went and it was so much fun. I went by myself and felt kind of awkward at first but a few minutes in, I was hooked and just didn't care what I looked like. There were all kinds of people there and I didn't feel like I stuck out at all. Anyways, it was just tons of fun.

Maybe if I make a commitment on this blog, I will actually be better. I just want to be healthy, but I am so easily tempted by food. I absolutely hate counting calories but I might have to pick it up again, just to get an idea of where I actually am. I need to learn to say no. I've told Mathew I really need his help. I seriously can not do this by myself and I need someone there to always be encouraging me and help me make the right choices because clearly I can't make them on my own. What happened to that time when I lost 20 pounds no problem???? I want that attitude back. I guess I'll just have to dig around to find it.

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Valentine's Day

This Valentine's Day was awesome. Mathew totally spoiled me and made it such a special day.

For breakfast, I made us stuffed french toast. It was so delicious. I wish I could say ours looked like this, (I did use the same recipe) but it was a little less beautiful. I used raspberries instead of strawberries and definitely enjoyed every bite.

I then gave Mathew his present after breakfast. I got him a pen with his name engraved on it...and a bag of Snickers. He had an engraved pen from his mission that somehow has been misplaced. I have felt terrible about it and wanted to make it up to him. He seemed to love it. :) He gave me my first present, which was a heart shaped box of chocolates. Score.

We then rushed to the car to go to class. I drove so I could drop him off and as we got in the car, he told me to grab a box that was in a little compartment by the steering wheel. I opened the box and discovered a  beautiful pearl necklace. I my goodness, I LOVE it. Mine has blackish pearls instead of white though.

So, the day proceeded and later that day I had to accompany someone. He took the car to go get us a heart shaped pizza for dinner. When he picked me up from the Snow building, I got in the car to find a bouquet with roses! Ah I was so excited. I've teased him because he's never given me flowers and of course it's every girl's dream to get flowers from a boy...well it's always been my dream at least. I was ecstatic. He totally spoiled me. My engraved pen kind of seemed lame by the end of the day but oh well. :)

Thursday, February 9, 2012

Tired of blogging...

I'm going through a phase of disliking blogging. I don't really have much of a desire to get on here and post haha. Anyone else feel that way? All I want to do is crochet, study, and read other blogs...oh and get on Pinterest. Speaking of Pinterest...I totally resisted it for so long. I was determined to never get on that bandwagon. Thanks to my fashion design class, that commitment failed. Now I'm so glad I'm on it. I've found so many cute crochet projects and super yummy recipes. I still try not to stay on for too long though, I don't want it to take over my whole life!

So, here's an update on us in bullet points, because I'm far too lazy to write full sentences and paragraphs right now.

  • We donate plasma for money now
  • I had a session with a fitness consultant/personal trainer yesterday and my quads hurt like crazy! 
  • Biggest Loser is driving me crazy this season. Not very inspirational and so overdramatic. Conda has GOT to go.
  • I love White Collar
  • We walk to class whenever possible. It's a mile and a half each way.
  • I'm losing motivation to do well in school now that I don't have to worry about scholarships
  • I got a new MacBook Air and I love it but am still pretty attached to my old MacBook
  • I'm going to be in a fashion show at the end of the semester
  • We tried our first bountiful basket and I suck at using produce
  • We have an addiction to G's Dairy ice cream...and the same guy is working every time we go so I feel a little self-conscious
  • My crochet sales are dwindling and I would really appreciate any advice for how to make the business better. Also, seriously, please spread the word. Word of mouth is seriously the BEST way to let people know about my stuff. 
  • Mathew and I can't wait to be done with school. 
  • By the end of the semester, I'll have slopers for my own body so I can design and make clothes for myself! Yeah!
I can't think of anything else to say. Someday I hope to like blogging again. :)