Feeling Humbled

I don't know how many people saw my post a while ago about the doctor who basically made me feel like the biggest failure because I had gained too much weight. Well, if you didn't see it, I'm sorry I can't link back because I accidentally deleted it, but pretty much at 31 weeks I was lectured about how I was gaining too much weight and I couldn't gain any more and I was putting myself at risk for a c-section and giving my baby diabetes. It was a horrifying appointment and I had never felt worse about myself.

Well after a long day of crying and feeling crappy, I decided to make a commitment to be healthier. I figured I would eat healthy and probably still gain weight and so he would just have to deal and accept that my body just puts on more weight than average during pregnancy. I didn't think I was doing THAT bad. I really just thought I was someone who naturally had more weight gain. I thought he was just being a butt-head doctor who only focused on averages and didn't realize that everyone is different and it's okay to gain a little extra weight. I still think he handled the situation terribly and could have been much nicer and gentle with me...but I'm kind of grateful that I received a reality check. Here I am 8 weeks later and instead of gaining the extra 12 pounds that I was on track to gain, I am up 1. Instead of measuring 3 weeks ahead like I was at 31 weeks, I have been measuring right on track at every appointment. I feel so much better at 39 weeks than I did at 29. I don't feel like I'm miserable and ready to be done being pregnant. Granted, I am anxious to be done to meet my baby girl, but my anxiousness has nothing to do with being uncomfortable. I haven't had any major swelling that I hear happens the last few weeks either. Sometimes I feel like my face looks chubby, but maybe it's in my head. I'm just happy my ankles and fingers have managed to stay looking normal.

I thought for sure it wouldn't be healthy for me to worry about calories and start a walking routine everyday. I was convinced that it was a bad time to change things. I was too far along! It wasn't smart to try to restrict my diet. Well, I was wrong. Completely wrong. Those changes were exactly what I needed. I can't imagine how different I would be feeling right now if that doctor hadn't spoken up and given me the hard truth. I have avoided him every single appointment since then, so I have no idea what other things he would have said to me. I have no interest in his opinion or feedback on how I'm doing. I know that I have bettered my health and done what is right for my body and for the baby. And the other two doctors have only had good things to say. So THERE mean doctor! :)

Anyways, I just wanted to acknowledge that this doctor may have been completely rude to me but the end result was positive and I'm grateful and humbled by that.

Lastly, if anyone cares, last week I was dilated to a 2 and 60% effaced. Got checked again today and no additional progress. Boo. Maybe the full moon will work its magic on me tomorrow. I'm just really hoping I don't have to get induced. The more I have read and prepared for birth, the more I really want to be able to have this baby without medication. It just feels right and I'm scared an induction will make that nearly impossible. Pray that this baby decides to come on her own!